Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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