If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
