sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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