So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
