Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i dont even know how to be here
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
