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• (303): View more from Colorado

  he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care

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• (518): View more from New York

  I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.

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