He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
