You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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