OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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