Texts From Last Night

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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?

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  (701): Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave? http://tfl.nu/y6y0
  Replies (17) Good night (4659) Bad night (816) Order T-Shirt
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.

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  (504): She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise. http://tfl.nu/2rjq
  Replies (27) Good night (818) Bad night (2803) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture

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  (937): We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture http://tfl.nu/edj0
  Replies (25) Good night (602) Bad night (7512) Order T-Shirt
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  you'll never guess what i found when i got home...

  (928): View more from Arizona

  a cake, in the toilet

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  (602): you'll never guess what i found when i got home... (928): a cake, in the toilet http://tfl.nu/md4l
  Replies (25) Good night (5560) Bad night (1005)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  it's like her boobs came off with her bra

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  (412): it's like her boobs came off with her bra http://tfl.nu/ua1r
  Replies (55) Good night (1472) Bad night (15283) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?

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  (918): Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet? http://tfl.nu/ki3z
  Replies (5) Good night (4483) Bad night (761) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest

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  (815): Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest http://tfl.nu/qjdf
  Replies (12) Good night (4310) Bad night (622)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?

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  (616): A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus? http://tfl.nu/o777
  Replies (13) Good night (6195) Bad night (1122) Order T-Shirt
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident

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  (712): slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident http://tfl.nu/zocq
  Replies (2) Good night (901) Bad night (1247) Order T-Shirt
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow

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  (802): He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow http://tfl.nu/7xi8
  Replies (18) Good night (3072) Bad night (662) Order T-Shirt
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch

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  (812): You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch http://tfl.nu/d9ik
  Replies (3) Good night (1523) Bad night (351)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.

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  (910): Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down. (803): Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you. http://tfl.nu/a5n4
  Replies (8) Good night (1636) Bad night (629)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.

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  (720): my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am. http://tfl.nu/xw8k
  Replies (8) Good night (1322) Bad night (405)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?

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  (218): At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me? http://tfl.nu/x27k
  Replies (3) Good night (975) Bad night (400) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?

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  (313): My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up? http://tfl.nu/qcgq
  Replies (1) Good night (719) Bad night (264) Order T-Shirt

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