Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
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