shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
