i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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