Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
