I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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