"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize