a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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