How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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