Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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