i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
