the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
