I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
