Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
