She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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