I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Blood and glitter go together right?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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