Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
