we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize
