i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
