i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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