O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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