it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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