remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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