Have some text gold?

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  • Why not ask to be buried face down, too, so the world can kiss your ass? Or in case your friends wanna drop in for a cold one.

    Submitted by GetOffMyLawn on Mar 28, 13 at 6:15pm
  • Make a deal with the mortician to insert penis implants after you die, that way you have a fully erect, 14" dong sticking up out of the casket, and have a set of ring toss rings next to it in order to see who takes you up on it.

    Submitted by ThisCantBeReal on Mar 29, 13 at 9:06am
  • For whatever reason, nude corpse viewings are illegal in most states.

    Submitted by cfreymarc on Mar 28, 13 at 5:48pm
  • This shall be added to my will.

    Submitted by k688 on Mar 29, 13 at 7:15pm
  • @cfreymarc\nYou've looked into this before...

    Submitted by Twisted_84 on Mar 30, 13 at 1:08am
  • Top it off with a Fart Machine.

    Submitted by RoffMain on Mar 28, 13 at 5:23pm
  • You might be able to have the mortician manipulate your face into a ghastly expression. Maybe leave your eyelids open in a dead eyed stare

    Submitted by UniqueNordic on Mar 28, 13 at 6:09pm
  • Wow, difficult right to the end.

    Submitted by NuckinFuts on Mar 28, 13 at 4:03pm
  • I think that most people will be wondering what to say to your widow that properly conveys how sad they are she had to put up with your micropenis.

    Submitted by fly_bi_night on Mar 30, 13 at 8:45am
  • Have them leave you there a month or two, for some more chances...

    Submitted by kin_in_in on Mar 28, 13 at 3:26pm
  • Rigor mortis at its finest?!???

    Submitted by Key_umm on Mar 28, 13 at 6:13pm