If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
