that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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