the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Blood and glitter go together right?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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