i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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