wanna go halves on a baby?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize