Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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