I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
