Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

Kareoke will never be a sober sport

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(386): View more from Florida

First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.

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(519): View more from Ontario

I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(732): View more from New Jersey

its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time

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(480): View more from Arizona

It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...

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(713): View more from Texas

That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.

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(913): View more from Kansas

He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.

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(323): View more from California

in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels

(209): View more from California

you need to stop fucking English majors

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