So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
