Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Randomize
