woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
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Wow. Being that flagrant about cheating adds insult to injury, you're just a giant douchecanoe.
2:08, you're my hero. "douchecanoe" that's awesome!
Not funny in the least,nobody is perfect but you are the lowest form of trash
512 repppin I prefer douche nozzle to canoe cause it implies you suck and your full of shit, however gotta give props to this guy
Douchecanoe is my new favorite word (and he is one). This should be the type of text that the TFLN screeners should not allow. What a dick !!!
but yeah, I agree, total douchecanoe... no wonder the world's so fucked up and people don't trust anybody anymore.
3:10, I don't believe you wrote this text. If you did, saying "I love you" probably wasn't the best way to handle the so called "abusive wife". Your story fails, and you are a douchecanoe
I've never seen the word 'douchecanoe' so many times in the same place.
ASSHOLE! boys like you are the exact reason women trust no one!
2:51, I don't believe you for a second. You wouldn't call your ex your "hookup", that would make no sense. And why didn't you just get back together with your ex anyway if you were so in love? Plus it still doesn't justify you cheating, cheating AND not leaving just makes you a huge coward. Douchecanoe ruling stands.
If you wife is so abusive what were you doing sleeping with her in the first place. You didn't "mess up" and get her pregnant, you just cant keep it in your pants. I feel sorry for the Ex cause you will probably do the same thing to her. Once a douchecanoe always a douchecanoe !!
Fucking jackass, I hope you and the whores you've slept with get aids and die.
if you dont want us to judge you, douchecanoe, dont post your stupid texts!!
That's a douche move dude. :-/
Apparently cheating is funny, and something to be proud of. I guess I don't see it. I see them dying alone with AIDS or at least I hope so.
wow hes not even man enough to speak the truth..............poor girlfriend. what a waste of her time
You're a fucking chump.
I don't understand this text, I need Jeff to explain.
Hey at least he is being upfront and honest.,.
Well honest with the hookup anyway. So I give
Him a score of clymedia , or herpes , no let's
Make it an even HIV
Yeah you're not funny you're just a piece of shit.
Herpes the gift that keeps on giving.
:/ why.. Just why\nIf you want countless partners, great. Just don't hold one as backup with your lies.
3:58 you're the shit. This is hilarious I agree
If I could vote 10,000 times for 'don't like' I would sit here and take the time to do it.... As much of a waste of time as that is... It would be worth it.
Wow. So many things wrong there. You are pleased with yourself. You hook up with sluts who don't care about you having a girlfriend. You are not loyal to your girlfriend. You essentially take the piss out of your girlfriend by writing that message. You lied to her. You should die....
I DONT KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!!!!!! LOUD NOISES!!!!!!!!!
LMAO off at the convo going on in here... hats off to the new term Douchecanoe.. can't wait to use it tonight when drinking!
One of the best tfln ever. What kind moron would give this a thumbs down?
oh please douchcanoe.. all that judgment shit? we got the facts..all that extra bullshit doesnt matter. the simple fact is, your cheating on your wife. and if you dont want people to tell you their opinion, dont be a stupid ass and post it on a site where we can tell you anonymously... fuckin retard
The texts suck but the replies make it worthwhile reading! TFLN bigwigs are laughing all the way to the bank!
im the one who posted this. its still funny to me.....ha ha ha....
gypsies tramps and thieves has turned into whores, sluts and douchebags
just, doenst sound great in a song
Douchecanoe is amazing!
This isn't even funny. I hope you get AIDS.
That is absolutely amazing. You guys all need to stop being such herbs.
Fuck you 2:55, i hope you die alone. Better yet, i'll cut you into pieces and store you in my freezer and use your meat to make hamburger helper. And i'll do it to all the other assholes in the world to make hamburger helper for all the starving kids in africa.
I love you... Well that was nice :)
What a lovely person you are ¬_¬ dick
You called the "one you love" last night's hookup in the message. You also told your wife that you find abusive and wish to leave, that you love her. That makes you a cheater, a liar, a pussy, and a fucktard.
There is no punishment great enough for this. Except having to spend the rest of your life being YOU. Yep, that should just about cover it.
P.S. also stealing douchecanoe
Cheating makes you so cool and awesome and manly... Until you get an STD and your dick is fucked up. That's what you get for cheating.
seriously.. i dont get it will someone explain it
He was cheating on his girlfriend, the girl he was cheating on her with and him were fighting about what to say back to her. He ended up saying "I lobe you"
Wow. To everyone here who doesn't think this is hilarious... "Lighten Up, Francis."
2:51 you're an idiot, like we really believe it was you. and like someone else said, you wouldnt call your ex who you're "in love with" last nights hook up! FAIL
Die in a fire.
All women are whores "all women"!!!
Wow your an asshole.I hate cheaters and now you should go die in a well.bye
does this even make any sense?
Well at least she can't say you never gave her
Anything . It's the present that doesn't require
this is fucking gross, cheating is not cool you fucking moron you ARE a douchecanoe, hope u drop dead
12:05... That's funny until you pass it to the faithful girlfriend who's done nothing to deserve the STD except trust a douchebag. Sad.
I just wanna ride the tardrocket
You worthless piece of shit.
he clearly doesnt love either of these ladies if hes going to treat them this way.
i think we all know the difference between true love & herpes.
herpes is forever......
Oh and you make the stereotype that prevents so many people (men) from having relationships. You are so sweet.... DICK
Haha love the Cher reference
i dont really get why everyone hates this guy
and wtf is a douchecanoe? i guess douce must be buoyant
Just because you pricks are jealous of someone who has a gf and a piece on the side doesn't make them a bad person!! The douchecanoe rules!!
Hahaha, love it! Keep up the good work
Wow, with the number of times I've seen 'douchecanoe' on here, we must have a douche regatta taking place.
Hilarious!! You people are all way too uptight!!
Douchecanoe here: I am NOT op. It just happened to me too.
2:08 im stealing 'douchecanoe' from u haha
The douchecanoe here! I am in love the first girl I was ever in love with (the ex that I hooked up with) I only married my wife because I messed up and got her pregnant. I am gonna get the balls to leave my abusive ass wife one of these days and I know that my ex with still love me just as much I love her.
Haha fuck yea never be loyal to any bitch.
Bet it was a joke, and the "hookup" was his girlfriend...
he is married 4:29
he posted that he was married and cheating on his wife with an ex girlfriend in a post after his original one
this would be from my area code..
I didn't call my ex a hookup. I hooked up with her after we talked for a few weeks and the love we both had resurfaced, dick.
I may be a douchecanoe to u jackoffs, but you weren't there. You do not know my story. Judge not lest ye be judged. Only after u have all the facts can u make an accurate conclusion. Otherwise you are just a tard who thinks u are better than me. But your not.
Wow I did the exact same thing. When my wife found out about me and my ex hooking up
asshole. end of story.