So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
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