Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along. http://tfl.nu/9dyn
  Replies (22) Good night (4737) Bad night (750)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs. http://tfl.nu/e91l
  Replies (14) Good night (3579) Bad night (772)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  why does my vagina smell like weed?

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  omg thats a great idea

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): why does my vagina smell like weed? (215): omg thats a great idea http://tfl.nu/ft3y
  Replies (30) Good night (4435) Bad night (946)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous. http://tfl.nu/oxg9
  Replies (18) Good night (5033) Bad night (728)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night http://tfl.nu/pk50
  Replies (13) Good night (4844) Bad night (802)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me http://tfl.nu/t8we
  Replies (22) Good night (6801) Bad night (1151)
• Favorite

  (660): View more from Missouri

  dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome

  (816): View more from Missouri

  no its not leave

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (660): dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome (816): no its not leave http://tfl.nu/95g2
  Replies (92) Good night (2297) Bad night (8169)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was? http://tfl.nu/e02a
  Replies (21) Good night (1605) Bad night (4802)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (636): I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high http://tfl.nu/wyfj
  Replies (16) Good night (4759) Bad night (2210)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around. http://tfl.nu/0d7u
  Replies (4) Good night (2732) Bad night (1045)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever. http://tfl.nu/2k0u
  Replies (7) Good night (2659) Bad night (739)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome. http://tfl.nu/la0v
  Replies (5) Good night (2979) Bad night (1000)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw. http://tfl.nu/0rhv
  Replies (2) Good night (1088) Bad night (544)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.

  (309): View more from Illinois

  I'm bringing the tv in with me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice. (309): I'm bringing the tv in with me. http://tfl.nu/mqt8
  Replies (17) Good night (2051) Bad night (1223)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon http://tfl.nu/u33x
  Replies (0) Good night (669) Bad night (292)

Randomize