I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize