yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
