The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Randomize
