i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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